I think there are some maritime blokes here?

Here is a video of an Aussie polititian explaining about a tanker where the front fell off

<embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/WcU4t6zRAKg&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed>

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I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?"
She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

That can't be for real! Mind you, it is a politician and he is Australian so...........

Magic

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There would be less trouble in the world
if l had not had six daughters

Is it a Monty Python sketch

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It was an interview - quite a while ago now - to explain how the front fell off (obviously!) a tanker in Western Australia

Kirki, Western Australia, 21 July 1991

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I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?"
She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.